While shopping yesterday I wandered into the wall art section of the store, yes it was one of the mega stores but I always seem to find something to hang on a wall there. I happened over this one that was the hips to toes of two women that are dancing in a very large puddle of water, one in heels and the other in rain boots. The caption down the side of the picture said, “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass… it’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
If someone had asked me a few years ago if I was living this quote I would have applied in the affirmative and just smiled like the confident and strong woman… that I assumed I was.
Fast forward to today – I am a single mother of a special needs toddler and I am a breast cancer survivor. Damn.
I know it is clique to say if I knew then what I know now (fill in the blank) but I never would have imagined myself in this situation. I would not have imagined so many in a similar one but I believe that our lives change and edit themselves as our worlds evolve and change.
I was always a strong woman. I was independent and I stood on my own two feet. I was not the woman who was going to have children; I was going to join the peace corps or travel around the world doing something.
I am a stronger woman now, I am more independent than I have ever been but I gladly and graciously accept help when offered now and I stand on my own two feet because I am helping this wonderful little man stand on his own two feet as well. I am the mother that I never thought to be or would have ever expected to be. I am the woman who is confident enough in her own skin that I can stand there without a shirt on, proudly showing off the scars from the surgery that saved my life. I am the woman that doesn’t mind getting choked up at commercials and I can cry when the mood strikes me.
I don’t have everything that I want but maybe I have everything I need right now.
I have a wish list, probably just like many other people but I know that I can work on that list, I can whittle it down and make it manageable and I can set goals for myself and my little family that we can attain.
Now I am proud to say that I am here on the journey not looking at the end not thinking about what will I do tomorrow; now I think about what will happen in five minutes or what amazing thing will my son show me today. I know that we will be okay and I know that I will weather whatever comes at me.
I am proud of myself for finally slowing down enough in my heart, soul and mind to finally come together as a more complete more with it woman. And I don’t mind taking the days as they come.